{"id":1015,"date":"2002-12-30T07:22:01","date_gmt":"2002-12-30T07:22:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/random-average.com\/?p=1015"},"modified":"2002-12-30T07:22:01","modified_gmt":"2002-12-30T07:22:01","slug":"the-balrog-takes-7d6-falling-damage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/randomaverage.com\/index.php\/2002\/12\/the-balrog-takes-7d6-falling-damage\/","title":{"rendered":"&#8220;The Balrog takes 7d6 falling damage&#8230;&#8221;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a title=\"LotR as a bad D&#038;D game\" href=\"http:\/\/enworld.cyberstreet.com\/showthread.php?s=cb6308915ddd859be23671b34ef650cd&#038;threadid=34298\">Two Towers: LotR as a D&#038;D game<\/a>, and tons of other stuff.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>GM: Failed your climb check, huh? You slip and plummet.<br \/>\nPC1: Cool!<br \/>\nPC2: Cool? Dude, you&#8217;re falling to your death! Now we have to finish this stupid quest without your mage.<br \/>\nPC1 (ignoring PC2): Can I see my sword?<br \/>\nDM: Err&#8230; sure!<br \/>\nPC1: Okay, I want to fall down and grab my sword from mid-air.<br \/>\nPC2: What the hell? You dropped that like two rounds ago when you failed your balance check, then you wasted another round calling me a &#8220;fool&#8221; in character.<br \/>\nPC1: So?<br \/>\nPC2: You know how far something falls in three rounds?<br \/>\nDM (ignoring PC2): Okay, you&#8217;ve got it! Glamdring slides into your hand. You see the balrog falling below you.<br \/>\nPC2: But balrogs have wings! It says so right in the MM!<br \/>\nPC1 (ignoring PC2): Cool! I want to go attack the balrog!<br \/>\nPC2: You WHAT? Are you stoopid?<br \/>\nDM: You&#8230; umm, okay. Roll to hit.<br \/>\nPC2: What? No AoO?<br \/>\nPC1: A critical! I hang on to him and keep hitting him on the way down. Whack! (to PC2) This is going to be MY kill, baby. All those lovely, glorious XPs for a balrog, mine alone.<br \/>\nDM: (rolls a critical for the balrog that would kill PC1, panics, ignores dice) It missed you! Roll to hit again.<br \/>\nPC1: YEAH! You&#8217;re going down, servant of Melkor!<br \/>\nPC2: This is stupid. I&#8217;m going to go get some Mountain Dew.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Fun stuff (via Randy).<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Two Towers: LotR as a D&#038;D game, and tons of other stuff. GM: Failed your climb check, huh? You slip<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1015","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-links-resources"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomaverage.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1015","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomaverage.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomaverage.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomaverage.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomaverage.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1015"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/randomaverage.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1015\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomaverage.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1015"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomaverage.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1015"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomaverage.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1015"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}