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Carmel Feralia Courtly Manner When she pronounces judgment, she typically only remembers the first score or so words from the barristers; thus those arguing in her court learn to present their cases in extremely carefully chosen phrases. While many gentlemanly agreements have sprung up about how many words a barrister can utter before passing the floor to his opponent, many more duels have been fought over whether a scurrilously sub-vocalized article or adverb may have prevented the princess from remembering more the critical words of an opponent1. The most famous of such cases being: "Princess, my client lost his favorite pitchfork. [a an the]" "Princess, my client's wife returned said pitchfork, to her husband's [head]". The "a an the" muttered by the defense barrister is widely accepted as preventing the princess from recalling the prosecutor's terminal word ("head") and thus dismissing the case as a simple lost and found matter that she shouldn't have been trifled with in the first place. The subsequent duel between the barristers was, of course, fought with pitchforks. Personal Life The princess spent from the age of fourteen until twenty-one as a model for the House of Woven Reeds in Uvula, successfully modeling glass silk without significant injury. Those who knew her during that period state she has been much changed since leaving the House. The princess has steadfastly refused all suitors, preferring instead the company of her Fengaks, leading some to wonder if her line will end with her, while others' wonderings simply slip into realms of filthy fantasy. Given the quality of royally-blooded men in Dorniala, some have suggested that her refusal of suitors actually shows more spark of wit than they believed she was capable of.2 Some say she knows a dozen words in a dozen languages, while others say that she knows at least a score in her native tongue, please give her highness some credit. While she has talked about forming death squads on occasion to seek out those that disparage her intellect, thankfully she has thus far always forgotten to do so my the time she returns from the royal Fengaks chamber. - Yours in scholarship, Argus Penwizzle 1Sadly, barristers are a dying breed in Dorniala for this reason, although a campaign to duel with Fengak-tails rather than swords is catching on. 2This is rooted in the assumption that most Dornialans consider her to be quite dim - which might be an overstatement, irrespective of popular local expressions such as 'dim as Feralia'. |
