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"Ask not for whom the brain is tasty, for it is tasty for thee." With this, the Zom-Bey, a strange variant of zombie is let loose upon the world in the final verse of the "Lay of Un-Littlesmithick." While the poem is often credited to a devotee of the Prince Of Hams, or even Grayson Dawes himself, the interpretation of exactly whom the brain is tasty for has stymied gourmand and victim alike.

The Zombey of Un-Littlesmithick differs from your average shambling undead with some obvious traits. First, they are fast, causing the Duke Wells W Wells to have mentioned (while betting on a particularly gory gladiator fight), "Perhaps they should have been called 'Zoom-beys,' instead." While most wear turbans to hide the wound patterns that determine their lineage (a ritual to join a band once infected includes having a pattern bitten into the skin of your skull) it is not required.1

The control of their hunger (linked, unfortunately, to the decay of their "skinsuits") is another important aspect. While their devotion to the brains of sentient creatures is considered fact, it is well known that living flesh and bone are devoured whole.2 A Zombey can sustain itself on the 'lesser pleasures' for some time, but at some cost to their self-awareness. What has been killed is no longer interesting to a Zombey. It is said that one of the lesser "pilgrims" (a term they use amongst themselves for a leader of a band) keeps a pair of Wild Oolac? under circumstances to regenerate quickly so they might have flesh carved from a living beast each night.

Thirdly is the 'sight.' Neither rain, snow, darkness, or light seem to affect the Zombey. Only solid objects and the strange force they consider evidence of "life"3 seem to interfere with the Zombeys' tracking abilities. One of the reasons the Prince of Hams is said to have hired so many is to utilize this skill against rival Professionals.

Some utilize their dark powers to mesmerize the Cribain, and fly in terrifying gangs along the desert shelves, living the un-life of bandits. This was the common opinion of Zombeys for many years after the Un-Littlesmithick incident. Seemingly content merely to pillage, eat, infect, and occasionally take up a hobby, taxation efforts drew Zombeys into a frenzy of activity. Many have now been involved in long court disputes trying to declare themselves "un-alive," and splitting the spectrum between "life" and "death" to include other terms.4 Many are using their native talents including "negative energy." Some empowered Zombeys ("Lords of the Unseen") have taken to research to see about "antienergies" to cast "antispells" and "disdispells," a lucrative potential underwritten by some Gelts and Fengak entrepreneurs.

[1] Nearer the Xtant, some bands go bald just to proclaim how they are taking control of their curse, whereas in Cribara a particular style of feathered hat made for some confusion between the Cribain race-goers and the passing band, which did neither group much good, all told.

[2] Feathers seem to be a problem, leading to the false belief that Zombeys avoid feathers like vampires avoid sunlight. Alas, poor Gerald Ainslough.

[3] "Lifeforce" and "magic" seem strangely linked in Zombey mythos, although there are a few lich who might disagree, were they not busy with tootsie roll pops.

[4] Some signposts on the spectrum include, "Mostly dead," and "Pining for the fjords."

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Page last modified on November 04, 2008, at 10:53 AM by Meera

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