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Excerpt of a transcript from surveiller of the League Of Professionals, circa 1123.

Subject B arrives, joins Subject A at booth.

"You're late."

"Yes, thank you 'm'lord Wells.' Now ask me if I care."

"Should I ask if you had a good reason?"

"Don't. It'd be an uvalulu-sized pain in the arse to think one up. What are you drinking?"

"... you're being particularly difficult."

"Am I? Have you met me? What. are. you. drinking?"

"Rondemel. Terrible year."

"Mmm. Still better than the other options."

Subject B orders with a hand signal. Several minutes pass in silence.


"Excuse me?"

"It was a Pisanka. Painted up to look like the Palace."

"That's why you were late?"

(takes a drink) "Yeah."


"Worse. [pause] Someone had squeezed a Closet Dimension inside, and then squeezed a Nekrotoad inside that."

"A --"

"Yeah. I hit the button on the outside, it started playing Zenith Of My Loves Tenderness and out popped eight feet of ugly."

"Those have been banned since --"


"Was it armed?"

"Two warglaives, full armor, and I think it had fengak sweat on its kneespurs. Smelled like it, anyway."

"What... who could have... Who would have sent something like that after you?"

"Who wouldn't?"

"Not Pi Wi."

"Well, no. He's pissed, but he'll mend. Obviously. Could have been the current Prince, I suppose."

"Sweet Woldecott, you owe him money?"


"Then --"

"I owe several of his girls money."

"How many?"

"Several. Many. Most of them?"

"Oyyy... Doesn't seem like him, though."



"It's probably about the next trip we're doing in the Humorless."

"I don't know what you mean."

"She's modified now -- should be able to sail xpletive currents."

"A void ship?!?"

"Shhh. Dammit."

"Sorry. But... a void ship? No one's tried that since Left Leg?, and the public outcry, even back then --"

"I know. Bloody dangerous, but it should be interesting."

"And you think someone wants to stop it. You."

"Honestly? I'm a little surprised they didn't send more toads."

< Neipera | Lexicon MNO | Nihumet Range? >

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Page last modified on October 29, 2008, at 05:16 PM by DoyceTesterman

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