Categories
Links & Resources

“The Balrog takes 7d6 falling damage…”

Two Towers: LotR as a D&D game, and tons of other stuff.

GM: Failed your climb check, huh? You slip and plummet.
PC1: Cool!
PC2: Cool? Dude, you’re falling to your death! Now we have to finish this stupid quest without your mage.
PC1 (ignoring PC2): Can I see my sword?
DM: Err… sure!
PC1: Okay, I want to fall down and grab my sword from mid-air.
PC2: What the hell? You dropped that like two rounds ago when you failed your balance check, then you wasted another round calling me a “fool” in character.
PC1: So?
PC2: You know how far something falls in three rounds?
DM (ignoring PC2): Okay, you’ve got it! Glamdring slides into your hand. You see the balrog falling below you.
PC2: But balrogs have wings! It says so right in the MM!
PC1 (ignoring PC2): Cool! I want to go attack the balrog!
PC2: You WHAT? Are you stoopid?
DM: You… umm, okay. Roll to hit.
PC2: What? No AoO?
PC1: A critical! I hang on to him and keep hitting him on the way down. Whack! (to PC2) This is going to be MY kill, baby. All those lovely, glorious XPs for a balrog, mine alone.
DM: (rolls a critical for the balrog that would kill PC1, panics, ignores dice) It missed you! Roll to hit again.
PC1: YEAH! You’re going down, servant of Melkor!
PC2: This is stupid. I’m going to go get some Mountain Dew.

Fun stuff (via Randy).